Adam, Author at uae

Mental Health – The power is through the talk and awareness

May is annually recognized as a month to raise global awareness about mental health disorders. With all the Covid-19 restrictions, this year has taken on greater significance due to the impact the pandemic continues to have on individuals and companies alike. It has taken on even more prominence with Prince Harry talking through his experience of therapy and coaching.

It is my hope as a coach since 2008/9 that this month’s awareness becomes the norm. That people can freely open up and it is seen less of a problem and rather that of an opportunity for us ALL to develop and grow. There are too many people suffering in silence for fear of bothering someone or being perceived as week. My clients have often spoken out about their journey and by being open have helped others seek a development journey. It’s a stigma that can be reduced one conversation at a time.

As my gift to you I have compiled a list of 10 ways to improve your mental health. Feel free to share with people you may think could benefit.

1. Get plenty of sleep – Sleep is really important for our physical and mental health, leaving us refreshed and ready to start the day well. Aim for 8 hours
2. Eat healthy, balanced and well – Energy management is so important
3. Avoid alcohol and smoking – People perceive them to be stress releasors yet in reality they numb emotional pain preventing people getting to the root cause
4. Get plenty of sunlight – Sunlight gives us energy and the vitamins needed to feel good
5. Manage stress – Regular journaling, exercise, gratitude expressions and meditation is a great way to feel better relaxed and calm
6. Activity and exercise – Exercise releases endorphins that will give you a natural high and leave you energized as well as looking and feeling better
7. Do something you enjoy – Life is short enough so make the most of it by working in something you really are passionate about and/or spending your down time doing things you love
8. Connect with others and be more sociable – Relationships are so important to how we feel. With the disconnect through Covid many of you will not have seen family and friends as much so connect on Zoom or if restrictions allow spend quality time with people that give you energy and strengthen those key relationships.
9. Contribute to others – Coming from a lens of love by helping those less fortunate or simply giving your time and energy to others will leave you feeling good about your life and fill you with energy
10. Speak to a coach or a trained professional about any issues you may be feeling or simply to go on a growth journeys – Yes, it is great to chat to friends, and yet a trained professional is confidential, has not judgement or vested interest and is an expert to connect you to your best self.

Share other tips and ideas to the community on my Instagram page @coachadamzargar and if you or anyone you know would like to book a Zoom strategy session please let me know on info@uaecoaching.com

Create a lifetime of passion and peace,

Adam Zargar
Gallup Strengths Top 5: Significance/ Consistency/Harmony/ Woo/ Context

Founder of UAE Coaching
UK | UAE

Qualifications:
BSc Hons Psychology (UK)
Masters Education (UK)
Masters in NLP & Life Coaching
Gallup Certified Strengths Leadership & Teams Coach

Instagram: @coachadamzargar
LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamzargaruaecoaching/

STAY COMFORTABLE – THE DEVILISH DILEMMA

Have you ever listened to your inner dialogue and doubted whether it had your best interests at heart?

Is it supporting you towards being your best version of you or hindering you?

If it is telling you to stay in the same place as you are now, to say no to opportunities or things that make you uncomfortable then chances are it has not had your best interests at heart. However, as its been your best friend for so long shouldn’t you keep listening to it ?

A devilish dilemma, right? Quite simply though let’s look at it logically. If it is really your friend it would be happy to see you evolve, grow and experience new things. I bet more often than not, like me, when you have challenged yourself and stepped outside your comfort zone good things have happened as a result.

Travelling the world as a shy teen…. Moving to Dubai not knowing anyone…Leaving teaching in 2008 to start coaching with no clients or salary…Saying yes to live TV…Embarking on my masters in NLP and Life Coaching and certifications in Gallup Strengths…Starting my own coaching company. What are some of yours?

I help my clients live outside their comfort zone and get comfortable being uncomfortable and that’s why they are so successful. The slight discomfort prepared them to grow and raise their standards so that they can become an even better person, spouse, parents or leader. Imagine that same thing happening to you… Beautiful vision, right?

Ask yourself what is more scarier….? Trying to stay the same and ending up a lesser version of yourself now or growing towards your true potential.

If it’s the later then what challenge (opportunity )is your inner dialogue telling you not to do this week? How would you grow from not listening and doing it anyways?

Ask better questions and YOU too will get better results

It has been 6 months since I was sat on the balcony after the announcement of a Dubai wide lockdown. Back then I was not certain what the coaching world would look like having been someone who had been seeing the vast majority of his clients face to face.

Would it even be possible to continue in my career? Would people be able to afford coaching? Would people ask for a refund for their journeys? How would I support my new family if we would both be out of work?

These were the fear based and ‘self’ questions that would surface inside my mind as panic and uncertainty took over. Can you recognise any of them in you? As an experienced coach I quickly noticed the danger signs of regression. When uncertainty happens many people will go into their survival mode and either look only at their needs or ask really disempowering questions that will not help them get the results they want in life. If I am being honest for the first week I was spiraling, and my state was being affected. Quite honestly if I had continued in this frame I would have created the very things I was afraid of.

Luckily for me something switched inside me as I stared out of balcony overlooking the lakes in the Greens. ‘Wake up Adam!’ ‘Ask better questions’ These words took hold of me and shook me to my core.

How can I grow and contribute even more?

My old driving question resurfaced and instantly I felt better. I did not have the answers I just knew I was on a better path as I was asking a better question. By the end of that day I had started to contribute and grow by writing an e-book (A toast to Corona – Our disruptive ‘friend’) that I was aiming to give for free to people struggling to cope. I knew i was not the best writer yet the passion and speed I wrote was all because I was uplifted by a better question.

I also committed to setting other goals focused on growth and contribution – 2 spiritual needs that lead to a more fulfilling life and achieved the following:

Write a Covid book to help people thrive during it
Posted on social media
Record weekly videos for Neuron a medical health company
Appear in at least 5 magazines / papers in UK and Dubai
Understand the power and reach of Zoom and do sessions on it around the world
Say yes to podcasts and insta/facebook requests
Do at least one webinar to a major corporation to help their staff
Wake up at 5am for 66 days in a row
Read a coaching book chapter every day
Sign up for at least 3 online courses and master classes

I am pleased to say I have met the majority of these. Does it mean I have been perfect…? Nope….Does it mean I am improving …? Yes and to be honest that is what I want to see in myself and others. As I explain to the many clients I have coached over the last decade, the power of your own questions and thoughts has the ability to make you feel fulfilled or leave you in a bad place. Literally your life is only as good as the questions you ask yourself and focus on. I, like my team are on a similar journey with you.

Now looking back I am pleased to say that as a direct result of my mindset and actions my coaching clients not only stayed working with me, embracing Zoom, I have never been busier.

I say this to highlight how success happens in the mind first and then in the doing. Mindset and actions have always been the key in your hand to your happiness. There are opportunities out there for you all even if like my wife you have lost your job through no fault of your own. The ones who win out of this will be the ones who are thinking better thoughts and asking better questions. Your patience, resilience to uncertainty and trust in yourself and that the universe has your back is what is needed and will become your greatest gifts.

I challenge you to keep growing and to really work on the thought and questions you ask yourself. As always I, and my team, are here to support you in your personal, professional or family journey. Explore an intake session to see where you are now in your life and where you want to get too. Myself and my team can then help you get there and be with you every step of the way as you understand yourself better.

Try These 3 Things Before Turning to Meds for Better Sleep

Insomnia and other sleep disorders are something that shouldn’t be ignored, as they come with a bevy of short-term and long-term consequences to your health and well-being. And while prescription meds are sometimes an effective temporary solution, they can exacerbate sleep issues over time. Fortunately, there may be ways to improve your sleep without turning to medication. If you’re tired of tossing and turning through the night, try the following drug-free methods: Use smartphone apps, make sure you have a smartphone that can power the apps, and invest in a new mattress.

1. Incorporate Smartphone Apps in Your Routine

Using smartphones—as with TVs, computers and tablets—in the bedroom is known to disrupt sleep. However, there are ways to use your smartphone that can actually improve your sleep if done carefully. For example, there are tons of apps that are designed solely for enhancing sleep. Let’s take a quick look at a few of them:

Pillow Automatic Sleep Tracker for iPhone tracks and analyzes your sleep trends through your phone or Apple Watch. Via smart technology, the app will wake you at the perfect time in your sleep cycle each morning. Also, it provides personalized advice and soothing sounds to help you achieve quality rest.
Capture is an iPhone app that provides a platform to record and analyze your dreams. It also has dream-inducing music and reality check methods for lucid dreamers.
Headspace centers around sleep-aid sounds and guided meditations. The app’s goal is to improve each user’s quantity and quality of sleep.
SnoreLab is an app for iOS and Android that records your snoring through the night. All you have to do is keep your phone by your bedside, and it analyzes the recordings and provides a Snore Score by morning. Not only can you listen to the recordings, but the app also uses metrics to single out snore trends each night.

2. Make Sure You Have a Quality Phone

Of course, if you’re going to use sleep apps like these, you need to ensure that your smartphone is up to the task. If your phone is outdated, you run the risk of it overloading and crashing in the middle of the night, which can throw a wrench in your sleep routine plan. If necessary, consider upgrading to a new phone. The new iPhone 11 has day-long battery life, which is more than enough capacity for an eight-hour night of sleep. Plus, there are a plethora of apps that are exclusive to iOS.

If you’re not a fan of Apple products, look into the Samsung Galaxy S10 +. This phone also has a great battery life, as well as powerful software that can smoothly run all of your apps.

3. Get a New Mattress

A mattress that has endured too much wear and tear can make it difficult to achieve quality rest through the night. If you shift around all night, wake up with aches and pains, see sagging or lumps in the mattress, or rotating it doesn’t help, it may be time for you to go mattress shopping.

If you determine that you need a new mattress, it’s important to do your research beforehand to ensure you choose the right type. You’ll need to consider your body type and preferred sleep position—side, back and stomach.

Prescription meds are not always the best answer for improving sleep. Look into the wealth of smartphone sleep apps available. If your phone is too old to keep up with the apps you need to use, consider upgrading to a newer model. Also, evaluate your mattress, and research different types if you find that you need a new one. If these methods help you achieve deeper sleep without medication, they’ll be well worth the investment.

How being an overachiever can lead to serious long-term misery and simple steps to become a high performer

Are you an overachiever or a high performer? Throughout my coaching experience I have coached many hardworking clients who have come to me because they are working long hours, are anxious and stressed about the future and unbalanced. In a recent article I was recently asked what the difference between an overachiever and a high performer was and to give tips on how to transition from the unhealthy role of an overachiever to the more healthy and rewarding role of a high performer.

Before I delve into some detail about the traits of an overachiever through a set of questions, it is important to sumarise the key aspects of the high performer. These people understand that the process is just as important as the result. They are the ones who nurture the people around them and build up businesses. The journey becomes the vital component in ensuring true long term success. So as you can see it is very healthy and fruitful to become a high performer, but why is it so unhealthy to be an overachiever?

Q) In your opinion what qualities or characteristics set overachievers apart from the rest?

They are future focused, constantly worrying about what the future holds rather than enjoying the present and the journey itself.
They are perfectionists, going above and beyond on each and every task they do.
Work long hours, doing more of the work that people would stay away from.
They hate failure or fear it and if they fail they view it as a slight on themselves.
They secretly have a lot of self doubt, thinking they are not good enough.
They seek love and approval through external ways. They will work harder than everyone else and do more on a task because they think it equates to love. By working hard people will love them more.

Q) Do you think that once a person starts doing well in a certain field there is a certain pressure to continue to excel? Both internally and externally?

Yes if you start very well and set high (unrealistic) expectations to start with you will be putting pressure on yourself and facing pressure from others to maintain or even surpass that level. Raise the bar too soon and you are expected to keep growing and pushing on, sometimes to an unrealistic level. I believe slow and steady wins the race and it is better for long term emotional health. Pick and choosing what to excel or work even harder on is key. The bosses will give more work and praise lots. You may come addicted to the validation that you associate with praise, feeling love and respect comes from working harder and getting praised. You will then search for more to do and say yes to things you should not be doing and that others don’t want to do.

Q) Tell me about that internal pressure — how can it take a toll on a person?

It can lead to that person becoming stressed and exhausted. All the long hours to get ahead of the game and doing work to ‘perfection’ – editing it, improving it and never quite thinking it will be good enough. It may lead to you not sleeping that much or have interrupted sleep as your brain is engaged and active.
The never-ending competition with yourself and others will inevitably take its strain. Overachievers view failure more as a personal reflection on themselves and it will eat them up inside, whereas a high performer is more likely to embrace failure as part of the journey to ultimate goals. Rather than fear it and stay in the comfort zone they seek challenges and the growth that comes from that.

Q) Can it lead to an early burnout?

Yes over achievers tend to be unbalanced. They tend to sacrifice their social life for a perfectionist life duly working on everything they are given regardless of the value it adds.
They will feel resentment in long term and quickly burn out. If you imagine spinning lots of plates at once, eventually you will become tired and drop them.

Q) What can over achievers start to do to handle the internal pressure?

They can set a realistic time limit on their decisions and tasks and stick to it as best as they can. Flawlessness and perfection is impossible, in fact it’s the enemy of good. Yes its ok to do over and above for some things but not everything. Pick over and above for the high value tasks.
Start to do less important things imperfectly – set a certain time for those tasks and do the best job within that time slot. Then assign more time for the high priority, bigger, and most valuable tasks.
Think about your work duties and strengths and take a moment to ask yourself the following things:
“Is this something I’m expected to do within my job role?”
“Is this something I enjoy and have a strength for doing?”
If yes…
“How will it benefit me or the company if I do it?”
“What is the value added of doing this job?”
Focus on work that adds value not putting excessive work into things anybody can do and becoming a busy bee. Anybody work does not get you the promotion.
Know when to wait, when to attack, how to sacrifice, and when to change direction.
Take a moment to meditate daily (headspace app) so you are in the present instead of angry/upset about past and being anxious or worried about the future.

Q) What can over achievers do to handle the external pressure? (from parents/ friends/ teachers or colleagues if they’re working)

Communicate openly and honestly to manage expectations
Learn to say no on occasions to work that does not add value.
Take time out to strategies and target the value added / most important task first.
Listen to your own self-talk and be more loving towards yourself. Your words and thoughts are more valuable than others.
Take time out for self (life balance). Make your health (physical and emotionally) the most important priority.
Start meditation. Try first with Headspace – a free app to get you into the present frame of mind for 10-15 minutes a day. Remember you don’t need to be great at it, do your best and know you will improve. Know that great things take time and commitment.
Learn to take off the mask and put the ego aside. Practise being your transparent, authentic and honest self.

Q) What should all overachievers keep in mind in order to transition into high performers (achievers)?

It is so important to remember that the joy is in the journey itself and not purely on the outcome. Success or failure is simply feedback and learning that will help your future growth.
Life is about taking risks and sometimes failing. It is how you will ultimately grow. Good and great things come outside the comfort (dying) zone and on the other end of fear are the challenges you need to grow.
Choose tasks that will quicken your growth, that are a struggle, yet add great value. You cannot win and be great at everything. Pick and select what you will do and what you will work over and above at.
You feeling of love do not come from someone else praise on the tasks you do. It comes from inside of you. Work on loving yourself regardless. Get in the habit of talking positively about yourself and your worth.
Differentiate between the image you project and the real person you are. As an overachiever, you are tempted by the trappings of success because they are proof that, “You won the game.” At least this one. You feeling of love do not come from someone else praise on the tasks you do. It comes from inside of you. Work on loving yourself regardless. Get in the habit of getting self recognition (talking positively about yourself and your worth) rather than external recognition
Start to say no to unrealistic expectation from others and most importantly from yourself.

10 strategies for successful revision from a child that knows…

My job is pretty amazing. On any given day I get to work one to one with some great insightful minds, whether it be a top leader of a car company here in Dubai or a child.

Seb, age 12, has gone on an amazing journey of development over the last 6 months. He has been relentless in his quest to improve his focus and grades at school. I am sure his exams over the coming month will reflect the progress he has made internally and externally. Below I have taken some of his amazing strategies for revision success. The beautiful thing is some of these tips were in our discussion to get success in sport or gaming and then he realised they can also be applied to exams.

Note: I have added my own coach tips below his.

Feel free to share this blog post on your social media or with your child. The best bit about coaching is the contribution we can make when people share what they like to read…

1. Remember the worst thing that can happen is that you will get feedback. Yes failure or mistakes are just feedback. The key is to take the learning from it, change something for the next time and go again. When taking the learning ask yourself better questions. What can I do differently? How can I _____?

Coach Tip: Ask yourself better questions, questions that will get you to see the possibility of changing something.

2. Winning is an amazing addictive feeling. If you are going to be in school and have to study anyways then it is best to put 100% focus, attention and effort in. The more wins you can get the greater the momentum and the better the feeling.

Coach Tip: A win breeds more wins – positive momentum follows and attracts more success.

3. If you practise in between exams it releases pressure and helps your in exam skillset. Practise the technique over and over again. If you only learn facts but don’t learn the technique of writing an essay your grades will not reflect your knowledge.

Coach Tip – Learn the strategies that enable success and that you can apply your knowledge too.

4. Rewrite notes to aid memory and watch videos to inspire learning. It is well known that people remember things that they rewrite in their own words or that they watch. Children nowadays can find great ways of learning something online.

Coach Tip – Understand how you like to learn and use that medium. There are brilliant subject revision games on sites such as bbc bite size or documentaries on youtube for History.

5. Set an amount of time per day on test revision and stick to it. Be consistent. Try to do two half hour slots or one hour slot per subject / day for example.

Coach Tip – Scheduling is crucial. Design a quick timetable of what topics you will do/day and stick to it.

6. On weekends get at least one early night so you can get up early and while brain in shape you can revise. Then you have an early victory with which to build on during the day. You will also be refreshed. Tiredness can create stress and affect grades.

Coach Tip– Rest and sleep is crucial to exam success. Stay balanced. Go to bed early and wake refreshed.

7. Start revision a couple of months early and if you have not started start now. It is never too late to start and also you will know better for next time.

Coach Tip – Do a little bit of active revision each week throughout the year. If you do this you will have less to do in the last month before exams and always be one step ahead practically and emotionally.

8. Take control of your state. Listen to music you like that gets you in the mood. This is something you can fully control going into exams. Choose a different music song per subject. Before the English exam listen to the song that you chose to listen to during the English revision.

Coach Tip – Your state is under your control. You may not know exactly what will happen in the exam but you can set yourself up for success pre exam by committing to being in a great up lifiting state. State > Behaviour > Result.

9. Always reward yourself with breaks between revision topics and blocks. The breaks are a great way to clear your mind before you go onto another topic or subject.

Coach Tip – “The space between the notes creates the beautiful music” – enjoy the refreshing breaks with a clear head when you know you have done your focused block of revision.

10. Write down four revision goals for day. Reward yourself when you have achieved those goals as you deserve it. Imagine how good some treats will be when you fully deserve them.

Coach Tip – Enjoy the journey and the outcome will take care of itself. Reward the small milestones within your exam success journey.

I hope this has helped. Would love to know your thoughts on these tips and which one was the best for your child.

Have a wonderful day,

Adam Zargar
Director of UAE Coaching

If you would like further information regarding our child development life coaching service click here

Releasing limiting beliefs for massive results

“We learn our belief systems as very little children, and then we move through life creating experiences to match our beliefs. Look back in your own life and notice how often you have gone through the same experience.” -Louise L. Hay

Limiting beliefs are the silent saboteurs that lie in wait ready to prevent us from achieving our goals, or to cause us to self-sabotage our achievements, because deep inside we falsely believe that we don’t deserve them.

The difficulty with limiting beliefs, is that they are not always obvious, but with a little reflection and conversation with your inner voice, you can normally identify them.

Limiting beliefs are predominantly formed at a young age and become a part of your story. Perhaps you lost a running race when you were young, so you told yourself that you weren’t good at sports; or maybe your English teacher told you that your writing skills weren’t up to scratch so you just accepted that you weren’t good at languages. It could even have been that you told a joke once and no one laughed, so you decided to shy away from ever telling jokes again or speaking in public. Each of us have had a number of these experiences in our lives that shook our confidence and went on to shape the person we are today. The important thing to remember, is that you are not the same person you were 5 years ago, 5 months ago, or even 5 minutes ago. The only moment in time that has any relevance is now, this very second that you are reading this article.

Aside from labeling yourself as a particular type of person, you can often spot limiting beliefs in the way you react to certain situations. For example, if you’re experiencing financial problems, you may go through a number of feelings, including anxiety, anger and hopelessness. If you allow yourself to sit with those feelings, you’ll find the limiting belief right beneath them. Anxiety normally arises when you are worried about what others will say. Anger comes from a sense of injustice. Hopelessness arises when you don’t feel good enough.

Releasing limiting beliefs:

Speak with a trusted friend, family member or coach and share with them the moments when you have experienced really strong emotions towards a situation, or perhaps things that scare you like public speaking.
Get them to ask you questions about these feelings and get to the root of where the emotion comes from. When was the first time you remember being scared of public speaking?
Write your discoveries down on paper.
Say aloud a couple of times and write the words, ‘these are only beliefs, they are not truths’
Use your imagination to reframe the belief in a way that is aligned with what you want. ‘In the past I have prevented people from seeing the fantastic public speaker that I am.’ Once you realize that these limiting beliefs are only thoughts in your head and that they have no power over you, you are free to write the next chapter in your story exactly as you wish. Ask your friend or family member to keep you accountable to speaking your new truth.

Beyond specific limiting beliefs, many people are also unaware of the negative language that they use on a daily basis, that constantly wears away at their self-confidence and prevents them fulfilling their dreams. A powerful exercise to help you become aware of the language that you are using, is to keep a journal for a week of any negative statements or thought patterns. At the end of the week, review your notes and rephrase each statement in a positive way. You’ll be amazed at how negativity sneaks into every day phrases. For example, rather than saying ‘Don’t forget to pick up the dry cleaning’, say ‘Remember to pick up the dry cleaning.’

Once you release your limiting beliefs and become aware of the power of self-talk, you will feel your life shift massively. You deserve success and you will achieve it.

If you would like to know further information regarding our personal coaching service please click here.

If you would like a FREE strategy session with one of our Master life coaches please contact us on +971 551387652 or drop us an email at info@uaecoaching.com.

Discover the 10 Steps to understanding ‘What’ is important to you’

Are there times in your life when you wonder why certain situations, jobs, conversations just don’t feel right? We often say “I just didn’t warm to him/her” or “I’m not happy with the work ethic of that company.”

In our lives, we all have things we hold as important that we wish to be met in the varying contexts of our life e.g work, home, health.

In our lives, we all have things we hold as important that we wish to be met in the varying contexts of our life e.g work, home, health. These are our key Criteria. When our criteria are met, we feel great, aligned and on track. When these aren’t met, we can feel on edge or unhappy. Things can be going against the grain for us.

Understanding your highest criteria in certain contexts can provide you with the ability to make the right decisions and choices to increase your alignment and being fulfilled in that area of your life.

Whilst your criteria may differ across the various contexts of your life, they will be guided by your Values. Values usually span all the contexts in your life.

Knowing what your values are will help you to make better decisions when you have choices and also help you to understand your reactions and give you more emotional intelligence when your choices are limited.

Understand your higher Criteria and Values and take these 10 steps to become more resourceful for decision-making:

To understand the important Criteria in a context, take the following steps:

Choose an area in your life and ask yourself:

‘What is important to me in this particular context?’

Then ask ‘What else is important?’ and repeat this question so you have at least 6 things listed.
Review the list and choose the three that resonate the most with you.

These are your highest criteria for that area of your life.

Now take a step back, and look at whether your top 3 are being met in that particular context of your life?

If they are: Great! You are likely to feel aligned and comfortable in your current path in that area.

If they are not: How does it make you feel? If you want to improve or change this feeling, ask: ‘How can I create options for my top 3 to be present in that context?’

Repeat this exercise with any of the contexts in your life.

To understand the Values that drive you and your decisions, take the following steps:

Pick a peak experience where you felt aligned. Things were rich, full and flowing. There may have been challenges but you were on a roll.
Now think about what was important to you in that situation. Were there any Values that were being honoured?
Now think about a low experience where something or someone drives you crazy or makes you upset or frustrated. What is it you are feeling, thinking or hearing?
What values in this situation are being violated? Is the value being neglected and you don’t feel ‘true to yourself’?
Now take a step back and look at the relationship between the two experiences (Peak and Low). What are the Values being honoured and neglected?

How does this affect you?

What could you do to have more peak experiences?
What values need to be honoured so you feel more fulfilled?

What can you do so your decisions are more aligned with your Values?

If you can’t make those decisions, now you are aware of the Values being challenged or violated, how can you better manage your response?

What will you do differently now?

When you know what your criteria and values are, it gives you the power to make better-informed decisions, where alignment and satisfaction play out, if you choose for it to. It also gives you an understanding as to why you may feel frustrated, tense or not warming to a person or situation.

Remember: Your life is your creation. Is your knowledge of What’s Important To You supportive of a fulfilled life?

You can’t make the proper adjustments if you’re unaware of your challenges. You can’t create change if you don’t make the adjustments.

Contact us for a free strategy session to understand how our Master NLP Life Coaches can help you better understand your life and where you want to be. Email info@uaecoaching.com or call us on 0551387652.

How you can grow and become even more successful

“Great things never came at the end of your comfort zone”

Did you know that 95% of the behaviour you do is auto piloted and comes in the period of up to 7 years old and is on autopilot. The subconscious mind is a servant that works day and night for you to make your behavior fit a pattern consistent with your emotionalized thoughts, hopes, and desires. Your subconscious mind grows either flowers or weeds in the garden of your life, whichever you plant by the mental equivalents you create.

“Great things never came at the end of your comfort zone”

Your subconscious mind keeps you thinking and acting in a manner consistent with what you have done and said in the past.

All your habits of thinking and acting are stored in your subconscious mind. It has memorised all your comfort zones and it works to keep you in them. It causes you to feel emotionally and physically uncomfortable whenever you attempt to do anything new or different, or to change any of your established patterns of behavior.

Have you ever tried something new or risky and then felt an urge or pull to go back toward your comfort zone each time. Even thinking about doing something different from what you’re accustomed to will make you feel tense and uneasy.

Game Changer:

It is precisely what frightens you the most that you need to do.

Many of our clients come to us to develop, to be held accountable for grow by taking action out of their comfort zone. These successful men and women are always stretching themselves, pushing themselves, fully aware how quickly the comfort zone, in any area, becomes a rut. They are the 3% in the world that know that complacency is the great enemy of success

Action:

For you to grow, to get out of your comfort zone, you have to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable doing new things the first few times. If it’s worth doing well, it’s worth doing poorly until you get a feel for it, until you develop a new comfort zone at a new, higher level of competence.

What is the uncomfortable thing you must do personally and professionally in order to grow?

By coming to us they are not just getting the typical life coach approach to working on the surface level aspects. All our coaches are trained to create lasting change by using Time Line Therapy to help release any negative emotions or limiting beliefs that is sabotaging the conscious brains quest to reach its goals.

Action:

Contact us for a free strategy session to understand how our Master NLP Life Coaches can help you, your family or your employees grow. Email info@uaecoaching.com or call us on 0551387652

You become what you surround yourself with

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”
– Jim Rohn

A great mentor, coach and friend here in Dubai reminded me of this powerful quote of Jim Rohn recently and it has stuck in my head ever since. It is so simple and yet so true, and when I look back at my days as a teacher, I can see how this adage had directly translated into my pupils, even those as young as 10 years old.

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”
– Jim Rohn

Typically, the unruly children who challenged authority and who felt it was not cool to concentrate on their studies would all hang out together, whilst the diligent children who respected authority and the opportunities their scholastic success would bring, gathered together to work the hard and listen attentively in class. Think back to your childhood, I’m sure this was true in your school too.

This pack mentality begins the moment we are born. We are natural copiers, acquiring characteristics from our earliest influences and continuing to absorb traits for our entire lives. Similarly to my reflections of the school yard, I can reminisce on the spectrum of jobs I have held over the years, the mixed teams I have worked in and the colleagues I have found myself spending the most time with. Typically, I am generally a positive person, but when I started to spend time around people that felt disenfranchised by their jobs, held a weak work ethic or were generally pessimistic, this quickly started to infiltrate my psyche.

This moment of recognition was monumental in my life and I made a mental promise to myself, to always surround myself with a myriad of like-minded, successful and hard-working people who took pride in excelling.

Taking this powerful Jim Rohn quote one step further, you could say, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, the five books you last read and the five shows you last watched”, but quietly acknowledging that Game of Thrones is the most recent series that I’ve been consuming in abandon, I hope that there is some leeway in these assumptions.

In the spirit of sharing this Ramadan, here are some tools and learning updates from me to you, so you can bring your average up:

#1. Take time to evaluate your ‘Emotional Energy Bank.’

List the people in your life that you spend the most time with and assign a score from negative 100 to plus 100, supporting your score with evidence.
– Negative 100 signifies that they zap all of the energy from you, leaving you thoroughly drained and incapable of mustering any positivity.
– Plus 100 represents those individuals who exude positivity, a can-do attitude and boundless vitality for life, leaving you feeling completely energized, like you can achieve anything you put your mind too.

Zapper (-100) _______________________0_______________________Energiser (+100)

Once you have done that, identify the individual situations where you typically spend more time with the energizers or with the zappers, then make a concerted effort to only spend time in energizing situations with energizing people. You will be amazed how quickly doors will open for you, things will miraculously appear to go your way and you will leave the zappers long behind.

#2. Avidly focus on individuals who inspire and mentor you:

I have always made it one of my success rituals to spend quality time with people who I admire and can learn from. Even if it is only a single dinner, or a five-minute chat over a green tea, these moments are gold-dust. It doesn’t even have to be someone that you know personally.

Identify the areas of mastery that you want to manifest in your life and seek out those who are already masterful in these areas. Read the books they read, practice the habits they exhort and meditate on their pillars of success. They have already done the hard work for you.

Kevin Spacey famously said, ‘if you are lucky enough to do well, then it is your duty to send the elevator back down.’

Every truly successful person will recognize all those who have helped them reach where they are today and will be happy to help others on their journey. The internet makes things even easier for you by giving you direct access to the most accomplished people in the world. It’s your duty to tune into them, even if it is only a five minute YouTube video in the morning as you brush your teeth, or some of the motivational videos we share on the UAE Coaching Facebook page. Luckily for me as a coach, I get to regularly meet with like-minded coaches and clients.

So what are you waiting for? Take five minutes and list at least one person who inspires you in each of the prime areas in your life. Fitness, family, friends, intimate relationships, learning and hobbies, are all key areas that will benefit from your attention. You will probably be able to think of more, and it is personal to each of us. Create a mental or physical list of positive influencers that you can refer to and consciously realign your intentions when you feel you are going off-track.

List their name, their role, why they inspire you, and commit yourself to a time and place that you will set aside specially to learn from them.

Mish – Professional – Inspiring entrepreneur- Saturday 12-2pm dinner
Linda – Personal – Positive about relationships- Tuesday 7-9pm green tea

#3. Garbage in garbage out. Your media consumption is crucial to success:

We are exposed to a maelstrom of content on a daily basis, from the very moment we open our eyes, roll over and look at the newsfeeds on our mobile phones. You can be easily sucked-in to watching some irrelevant reality TV show, featuring people that you would not like to be, or reading negative, inflammatory news that immediately distracts you from your core purpose. You have to be fastidious about the types of material that you are exposing yourself to, because like the people you surround yourself with, it will quickly alter the quality of your thinking.

I will make it a morning ritual to read The Greatness Guide by Robin Sharma to discover some simple, effective strategies that ensure my personal and professional success. I am also dedicated to watching inspiring, transformational documentaries that transcend the everyday dumbing down that is synonymous with pop culture.

#4. Seek out the best in their field:

When you want to improve in something, the quickest and best way is to hire an expert in that field, or spend time in the company of someone with inexhaustible passion and dedication. I like to think of this as an investment (money and time) rather than a cost. The knowledge you get from this has multiplying effects and is the best way to get professional and personal success. I make it my business to seek out the best workshops, coach training organisations, personal trainers and corporate trainers here in Dubai. I know this is why I also attract some of the best coaching clients around, success attracts success.

I hope these 4 tips will help you grow both personally and professionally, rise in mastery and bring up your average. When you do this consistently, imagine the impact you will have on the world around you and the average of others.

Author: Adam

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